Dark Times At My Door

I know no one walks through life with out trouble of some kind knocking on their door. This will come as no surprise and alas I am smack dab in the middle of yet another crisis. Nick fell off the wagon. He got himself all messed up on drugs and robbed a drunken Colgate students apartment and is in jail. You know it's really hard living in this college town. Don't let the pretty window boxes and the small country sidewalks fool you. These college kids come here dangling with laptops and other devices. They drive a different vehicle for every season. Not every kid, but many of them. If they make it through the four years, then they are gifted with all kinds of money and lavish gifts from their relatives who all flood into town and want service yesterday. I guess you could say I'm bitter. I have retained a lawyer and at the advice from grieving family members have refused to bail him out. He's dug him self a pretty deep hole. His excuse was to help me out in paying his other fines from the troubles before. I'm wrung out from experiencing every emotion under the sun. My whole family is devastated to say the least. The lawyer is gonna try and get charges reduced but the stupid ass pretty much admitted to the crime being fucked up as he was. So right now the whole thing is out of my hands. I've talked to Nick several times. The first few days he was a crying mess. Yesterday he was ok and accepting to his fate in jail. He just may be there a year or more! I'm heartbroken. I'm hoping to get him back to rehab as there he will get help. Yesterday morning I was watching the news and they did a story on these head shops selling synthetic drugs and they showed several of the different substances, what they looked like and how you do them. One of the drugs looked like a cross of potting soil and chopped up cardboard...exactly the stuff I swept up from the floor of Nicks room several days ago. I don't know exactly what he was on and I'm not making excuses for his wrong doing. There is little wiggle room in this small college town and once you are pegged, you are pegged. I believe Nick has a serious sickness. He's a kleptomaniac. For me to come forth on line to admit this takes everything I have...Trust me. When Steven (my x) came home for mother's day he noticed Nick was on something. He told me this on mothers day and Nick was arrested on my birthday. Lucky me. I'm doing everything I can to stay busy. At one point I almost put in my 2 week notice as I was too embarrassed to even go to work. I discussed this with the manager and he was very understanding and promised me I wouldn't lose my job. (I got thinking they may even find some reason to let me go...I've been let go at other jobs for weaker reasons.) Tips have been awesome during these busy times which has helped greatly. Nick's lawyer is 1000.00 bucks. And he will accept payments. My friend Rich and Steve have been of great support. We are recording once a week and hope to have a cd of covers done by the end summer. There may be some originals mixed in. I thought to go through all my CD's and pick out one favorite from each one and re-do it. Steve really compliments my playing with his mandolin work. I'm very grateful. We did a music video of Grace's Ghost at the Syracuse Post STandard. I have yet to copy and paste it to my blog. I'll work on that today I guess. Should I share these dark times in my blog? Well I've already started. I guess there is no return now. Someone once told me that if everyone hung their troubles on a clothesline to see. They would quickly grab their troubles back as there is always someone with greater ones. Bill is in Florida with his father and I have the house and the next ten days to myself. One side of me wants to crawl into a corner and cry, with the other side begging to find a pack of roving gypsies and take off with abandon to Alaska. I'll likely end up weeding the back flower bed, killing each weed being like the synthetic drugs they are that slowly kill off our kids leaving them in jails and rehabs. I'll get through this one way or another.

Old Forge To Forked Lake

I thought last weekend was gonna be a 'stay at home weekend' to get garden beds weeded and edged, windows washed, and maybe even some recording in. I was taking a break watching Barefoot Contessa layering salmon with dill and salt when Billiam stuck his head in the door and said, "Hey the sun is shining, lets pack up the kayaks and head up north." Of course, he didn't have to twist my arm. I jumped up and we were packed and on the road in about 20 minutes. I really don't know why we just don't sell this house and move there. After a to go dinner from Slickers and walking the sidewalk past my favorite movie theater to be joined by a pair of scruffy deer for a light breakfast the next morning in Old Forge's own, Walt's diner which I learned was once called, The Ferns. And after pouring over a map of northern Raquette and the Long Lake area, we discovered route 3 which turned out to be a lovely paved forest road that winds past Buttermilk Falls to Forked Lake. Once there we found we could drive the kayaks right down to the boat launch to put in. The sky was that deep indigo blue you'd think you'd only see in Tahoe with a lonely jet steam etched into the ozone. After loading up our gear and getting Lou settled on his towel in the bow of my kayak. I pushed off and wouldn't you know it! The minute I got into the middle of the first bay, a wind came up out of nowhere making the paddle extremely hard! White caps and water spraying in my boat and Lou shakily looking at me thinking..why are you doing this to me? I made it to the yonder shore and kayaked close trading white caps for small clouds of black flies which weren't at all bad compared to other spring kayaks. Once on the Stillwater Hotel deck after battling clouds of black flies on a kayak to the Kettle Hote, an elderly man at a different table stared at me as I was trance like brushing my hair repeatedly. He finally asked me why I was brushing my hair for so long and I retorted back, I'm not brushing my hair I'm scratching my bug bites!" Looking over at Bill in his new 16 foot Current Design with a rudder easily cutting through the water I knew a shopping trip to Mountain Man was in my near future. My beloved twelve footer that I've had now for 6 years, and has carried me to many memorable woodland and swampland experiences, I knew I had to retire before one of these dark glacial lakes swallowed us both alive. A longer boat with a rudder is simply a must to safely kayak these larger and unpredictable lakes. So after about an hour of exploring Forked Lake paddling in between bouts of sunshine and wind, we decided to zig zag back to the boat launch and find another place to put in on a northern Raquette shore. Well! That didn't happen, as the last leg of my paddle was just a little scary, fighting yet another freight train of Adirondack wind to get across. I beat it. I'm buffing up by jesus! No bat wings on this girl! Arriving at the boat launch I looked over at Bill as he was scrunching up to shore in his boat. I must of had some kind of warrior look on my face because he quickly put out a peace offering of a shopping trip to Mountain Man in which I quickly accepted. After trying out three different kayaks the Delta Seventeen won hands down. She's fire engine red and tracks like a dream! I'm not a 46'er because of my fear of heights but I've kayaked hundreds of times on many lakes, reservoirs, streams and ponds. I've hiked miles of trails and camped in many a remote campsite and lean to that makes me feel truly validated and worthy of being called a woman of the Adirondacks.

2012 SBA Entrepreneurial Success Award! WAY TO GO CHOBANI!

So proud to have this fine company in my back yard! They've provided many jobs for the people in the area, (including my daughter Aurora) and put out a fine, natural, made in New York product. I've been cooking now with Chobani yogurt for the last few months trying out different recipes and have to say the vanilla pancakes are to die for and my breakfast smoothies couldn't be better! Congratulations to Hamdi and his hard working staff. I think all the musicians in New York should go out in the fields and play their music to keep the cows happy so they keep putting out good milk. What a video that would make!